Let me say this right up front. Today is April 1st. Again, listen closely. I said, it’s the first day of April. Just in case you have forgotten that means it’s April Fool’s Day.

You know, that one-day of the year when every co-worker, family member and loved one attempts to pull a little prank on you. (Hey honey, my mom and her three dogs are coming to live with us for the next two years. Just kidding.)

It’s also the day that nearly every newspaper, magazine, website or person with a blog tries like heck to scam you into thinking that some insanely absurd thing is true.

The key to snookering your mark is to sprinkle the story with a few elements that ring true. The basic premise should play on their desire for whatever tall tale or situation to actually be a reality. Or on the flipside, capitalize on their worst fears. Either way, you need to reel in the sucka and then at the end pull the rug out from underneath them.

If you’re really cruel, you won’t reveal your hoax and let them have the embarrassing privilege of spreading the story to many others. But in the end, the result is always the same. April Fool’s. Ha, ha, ha. I got you good. Boy, do I look clever and you look very, very foolish.

Obviously, April Fools joke are always magnitudes funnier when you are the perpetrator not the prankee. So, I’m going to spare you any possible embarrassment this year. Plus, you dear reader, are far too intelligent to fall for any lame scam I might attempt. Besides, I’m just too darn lazy to come up with something clever or plausible enough to dupe you.

Therefore, I will not attempt to hoodwink you. I will not use my powers of the pen (or keyboard) to make sure you are punk’d or bamboozle you. I have no desire to make you look gullible or hornswoggle you with a fake press releases about a new affiliate network.

I will not tell you Google bought MSN Search or Microsoft bought Google or that either one of those companies is going out of business.

I readily admit that there have been some memorable hoaxes, and there are also a handful of old standbys - most of which we’ve all tried during college dorm life. But too many of these so-called attempts at humor go awry and the tomfoolery ends up not being funny or in same cases just downright cruel.

I refuse to participate in that. There will be no April Fool’s day shenanigans or monkeyshines here today, but I’m not promising anything for the other 364 days of the year.

Let me know your best trick for getting more conversions or tell me your most foolish affiliate misstep.